the case of the missing underwear.*

What's better than an immaculate sky, a crashing surf, and ten of your best friends? JESUS!

Let me tell you this, though- there's NOTHING better than an immaculate sky, a crashing surf, ten of your best friends, AND Jesus (well, there was that one awesome week back in March, but for right now's purposes, just pretend I didn't swear then that nothing was better than Spring Break, which was really, really wonderful.) So, as I guess you've gathered despite that long, unfortunate case of parenthesis, I went to the beach last weekend. With my friends. More specifically, on a church retreat, which means we asked God to meet us there, and He surely did show up, people!

Can I tell you how it went down? No matter how many pictures I show you or how many synonyms of "awesome" I use to describe it, you won't get it, but because I'd like to remember this some day when I've forgotten, I will try my best.

I made a pit stop in Prattville for a night on Thursday, and that was just plain lovely. The real fun started Friday morning though, when Janie and I woke up earlier than we should've and put on our bathing suits and made ham sandwiches and and headed south with thoughts of sunbathing and sea salt dancing in our heads. We took THE most confusing route ever, but Stella, our conveniently-nearly-dead nav system, was a champ, and eventually, sunshine became a real deal possibility.

(notice effective use of the self timer yet again.)

What happened after that was pretty sweet: we went to a CVS and bought sunscreen and floaties and then we made a beeline to the sand. We laid down towels and we stayed that way for four hours, until we got thirsty. So, Internet, do you want to know what we did? We walked and walked- down the BEACH in the OCEAN- until we came to a nice hut that was not so hut like but more restaurant like and we sat ourselves down like we were adults and ordered something fruity and frozen that came with whipped cream and a cherry! Right there on the beach! Like we were actually adults! They called us ma'ms!                                                                  

 

Some of us liked our fruity concoctions better than others, I guess.

So that was a nice, relaxing day and that is sort of where our pictures end because someone who is extra clumsy may or may not have dropped the camera (Sorry, Janie! I'll do what I can to rectify that!). But let me give you a recap our of Friday night. You will be jealous with a capital JEAL and a capital OUS. 

8:30 p.m.: Feel certain that, after 3 hours of sleep, we may not make it past  9 p.m. This is a problem. Go to Starbucks.

10:00 p.m.: Participate in awe-inspiring worship.

11:30 p.m.: Be persuaded by friends to take a midnight walk on the beach.

12:00 a.m.: Arrive at suite 516 to pick up boys for midnight walk. Run out of gas.

12:10 a.m.: Decide that the BEST method of action would not be to get another car and drive to the gas station or even to walk to the gas station; no, the BEST action would be for 12 people to push the car to the gas station, crossing a 6 lane highway in the process.

12:15-12:22 a.m.: Follow above procedure.

12:30 a.m.: Wildly celebrate our success.

12:45a.m.- 1:30 a.m.: Hang out on the beach amid some confusion about who is there and who isn't. Decide to go home. But alas! There are 11 people! And one car! One five-passenger- two- door car! WHAT TO DO?

1:30 a.m.: Pile 11 people in said car. Rather uncomfortably.

1:32 a.m.: Get pulled over by kind, amused, albeit taken aback, cop who insists that while he pulled us over for a missing headlight, we indeed must all climb out of the car, where he proceeds to count (one, two, three...ELEVEN? ELEVEN PEOPLE?). He lets us go if we promise to take multiple trips to get everyone home.

2:00 a.m.: Sweet dreams about the most wonderful friends on this whole planet.

Because I realize this is quite possibility winning me an award for longest blog post ever, I will wrap it up: There was spaghetti and splotchy sunburn and sand in places that sand shouldn't be and beach walks and-best of all- and incredible message on what it means to walk with God. There was one on one conversation and kneeling and healing with the creator of the universe. There were tears and hugs and the resewing of bonds that had been tattered by busy lives. I'd like to challenge the rest of 2010 to show me a better weekend, thank you very much.

*I almost forgot! The mystery of the missing underwear! I managed to lose EIGHT pairs of underwear. Now, I realize that eight is a lot of underwear to bring to a weekend getaway; call me paranoid, but I like to be prepared (my defense is that you usually shower a lot at the beach...). Anywho, I dumped out all of this underwear on the floor in a hurry and used the bag as my beach bag. Later, everything else was there EXCEPT my underwear. Right there where I left it. Except beds were made up and towels had been collected- and my underwear was MISSING. We searched under beds and in the closets and truthfully, I thought it would show up in one of our bags, but the bags have been unpacked and I am still missing eight pairs of underwear it. If you see them, tell them I'm looking for them.

A letter to my best friend on her birthday.

Lauren Gracie,

Hello, love! How exciting that you are 19 years old tomorrow! You can buy cigarettes! And sign a lease! And get big girl shots! And let me be the first to tell you that I am so very proud of the person you are, and I am incredibly honored and blessed to be your friend. You simply amaze me; you have one of the most compassionate and gentle hearts I’ve ever had to pleasure of spending time with. You love me endlessly, without questions. You don’t mind that I come with baggage and that sometimes I get snappy and every now and then, I am just plain mean. You just love me like it’s your job, and I hope you never stop. I want you to know that we wouldn’t be complete without you; you are the third musketeer, the snap to our crackle and pop, the paper and to rock and scissors. You bring me more joy and sunshine than you can possibly comprehend- there isn’t a time that you can’t put a smile on my face, and if I am half of that to you, I would be proud. I want you to know that you’ve made this Coke scholarship worth it- it has been more fun than I ever thought it could back when I was dreading coming to Alabama Action. I think we were the luckiest ones of the whole group because we didn’t just get the money; we got a best friend, too. If you ever start doubting that you’ve got a friend, I want you to pull this letter out and remember that if I’m not with you, I’m wishing I was. Gracie, lastly, I want to tell you there if there’s ever a day when your heart is breaking, and tears are falling, and you can’t find your way out, I will be there to hold your hand until the clouds part and the sunshine dries your tears. I am here, and I will be, even if being your friend isn’t always the most convenient thing because, hey, you need me to do you a favor or you just need me to sit with you for awhile. I am so grateful that the Lord placed you in my life, and I promise I will try my best to be the kind of friend He wants me to be for you. I hope this nineteenth year offers you more happiness and laughter and brownies than you can stand! (You know the part about the brownies is true because we’ll have our own oven!)

Happy birthday, sweet girl. I hope it’s the best one yet.

All my love,

Lindsey

the five best spots at the greatest place on Earth.

Because in twenty years, I may have forgotten. And of course, these are my personal favorites. You don't have to agree with me! Bet you will, though.

5. Nott Hall- This place- the Honors College building- brings back memories every single time I enter it. It's the spot where I came, over a year ago, in my black pencil skirt, to interview for the Coca-Cola scholarship. It took us three hours to find it, and I'll never, ever forget walking up those stairs and going into the bathroom to adjust my slip. Now, I feel like part of a community of really smart people when I hang out in here. Plus, they offer cookies in the lounge.

4. Reese Phifer Hall- This is the Communications building, so of course it has a special place in my heart, but honestly, I think it is one of the prettiest buildings on campus. It is really stunning on the inside, too- really elegant and regal. I've had class in here all year and I love it!

3. The Ferg Promenade- I really can't explain why I love this part of campus so very much, but every time I walk down those steps, I get a happy feeling of belonging.It has a lot to do with the fountain in the middle of all of that activity, or the tulips that greet students as they climb the steps, or the ivy-covered columns...but my favorite part of this part is the engraved stone, amid hundreds of "Roll Tide Class of 86" and "Janice Smith Class of 56," there is one that says "To my favorite friend: I love you crazy."

2. The Quad- Well, duh. It is gorgeous, hands down. There a particular tree that is currently blooming white flowers, and I think it's my favorite one, but honestly, there isn't a part of the quad I don't like (even the mud puddles are a-ok with me). There is nothing better than sitting out in the sunshine (or under a tree) on a warm (or cool) day. If you don't believe me, I dare you to come try and tell me you're not a believer. The more you hang out out there, the happier you become. Trust me.

1. Amelia Gayle Gorgas Library- As if I haven't said it enough, I'll say it again: I love the library. There are six libraries on campus, but this one stands on the edge of the quad. I have spent hours upon hours getting lost in this place, taking advantages of the quiet and the literature and the wifi. I know the nooks and the crannies, the secret spots to hide when you really need to study, the best flavor of coffee, and when you can get a study room.

There you go! The next time you stop in Tuscaloosa and find yourself wandering around this place, visit these places. I promise they'll make you fall in love.

If I wrote you another letter, this is what it would say.

My favorite thing about college- or just the general becoming-an-adult process- is this: you get to decide who you want to be. All of those times that you thought I can do that better, I won't make that mistake, or I really will be someone? This is your chance to put those thoughts into real deal action. No matter how much you (or I) might try to flee from that reality, at the end of the day, your life is completely yours now; your decisions belong to you in ways they never have before. For me, that meant deciding to go to class, not to date, and to get plugged in at the right church. For you, it's different. I'm sure it is.

But it's also the hardest part. We're all different than we were; I know I am. I look back at myself a year ago and smile, because I see bursts of who I would become- fleeting dashes of color that allude to the eprson who is waiting around the corner. I couldn't really become that person, though, until I had the chance to not be that person. That is, until I was actually in control of some decision- only then could I really make the choice that was right for me, and the sum of those choices is me (I should go ahead and point out that I don't always make the right decision. In fact, quite a bit of the time, I make the wrong decision and that shapes me, too.)  But this is kind of beating around the bush. The point is that we all change in college, or after high school, or when we become (or are supposed to become) adults- different words for the same thing. You have looked me dead in the eyes and told me how very much I've changed. In fact, you said, you don't even recognize me. That's okay. Sometimes I surprise myself, too. You've changed, too, and when I click through the pictures you've posted online, or chat you on the instant messenger, it blatantly slaps me in the face: I don't know you anymore, either.

And that's what's unimaginably difficult to comprehend. I can't wrap my mind around it: we're not friends anymore. You don't know the most important things about me these days, and when people question me about you (they just assume things are the way they were), I don't have the answers anymore. I shrug and say, "Honestly, I haven't spoken to her in awhile." And when I say that, I have to gulp a little because I just can't quite believe those words are coming out of my mouth; for so long, you were the person I knew better than myself. Doesn't it seem strange to you? Coming home shoves this realization out of the back corner it hides in while I'm here and displays it in the bright sunlight. The minute that familiarity falls around me, I start thinking of you. Suddenly, I'm sitting on your couch eating an egg sandwich, or I'm laughing at you, hanging out in my passenger seat, or sometimes, I'm lying in bed with you, holding you while you sob, because, well, that was my job. But I'm not; you're not coming to visit and we're not hanging out at all, and I know that's for the best. We've gone around and around, and I want to get off the carousel- don't you? I've accepted it and I have moved on and I am truly happy- I promise.

It's just that sometimes I miss you. Sometimes I wish you'd be waiting for me when I got home or that you'd come visit like you'd always promised you would. Sometimes, for a split second, when I see my phone light up, I feel certain it's you because man, I haven't heard your voice in forever. But it never is, and I suppose that's for the best. You've moved on too, and who am I to stand in the way of that? I suppose the point of this is to let you know- if you didn't- that I haven't forgotten you. That sometimes my soul aches to be with you. Every now and then, I get that lump in my throat and a quick rush of hot tears because we didn't make it work, and I feel like I failed you. Occasionally, I drive our old routes and nobody else understands, and my heart trembles at the memories. And I remember you- I remember egg sandwiches and fried pickles, I remember singing in the car and dancing in your room, I remember getting off work or finished with school or out of bed and driving to where you were. I remember fighting for you and with you. I remember defending you and having your back and I remember you having mine. I remember spending hours upon hours where we weren't necessarily supposed to be (usually the library), but we did it so we could be together. And I remember all of the other people who helped do all of that, too. I know that that was a time in our lives that has ended, and I thank you, because you were the only person who fit so easily into being my best friend. It's over, though, and that mold has changed- and you don't fit anymore. In the same breath, I'm not who you need, either. Far from it. We changed, kid.  But you should know- I remember, and I won't ever forget.